I went on a verbal rampage a few days ago about the worst thing about NBC’s Olympic coverage (which otherwise is quite laudable). . . the inane “how does it feel? what’s going through your mind? what does this mean to you?” questions that seem to be the best that any of these poolside, trackside, courtside folks can manage. (How about “what was your strategy coming into the race? Did you manage to follow your strategy? Are you surprised with how this turned out? Did any of your opponents surprise you today? DUH! And that’s a klutz coming up with questions, not an athlete.)
But I will add to that list as a close second and third:
#2- NBC’s predilection for charting the medals count – that is, which nation is leading in the number of medals won – is really irritating to me. They do not allow any major telecast to begin or end without recapping the latest totals, and I really don’t see the point. When it’s all done, fine. (I suppose.) But does it really matter that today the U.S. has won 16 and Luxembourg is close behind with 14? And that tomorrow the U.S. has won 21 and Luxembourg has won 12? (Both of Luxembourg’s tiddly winks medalists were stripped of their medals for improper tiddlying.) I for one really don’t care. . . and I’m guessing that I am not alone in not caring about that. And even if lots and lots of people care about that, to trumpet those number so incessantly is just encouraging the greedier, uglier sides of our nature. If people must know, make them calculate it themselves, using the noggin that God gave them.
#3- The whole matter of “is Michael Phelps the greatest Olympian of them all?” is nearly as worthless and pointless a question as “how did it feel?” is. First of all, it has irritated me that so many people would be so quick to crown Phelps all-time greatest Olympian on the strength of these 8 gold medals in a single Olympics when other athletes in other sports can be just as dominant or more so but are not competing in sports with multiple events and multiple opportunities for medals. I would suggest that someone like discus thrower Al Oerter, who won the gold in his event for FOUR consecutive Olympics. . . ’56, ’60, ’64 and ’68. . . is as great an Olympic champion as anyone. So is Carl Lewis for achieving that same feat in the high jump – and doing so while also winning gold in other track events. Incredible. So are other great champions whose Olympic feats do not equal Phelps in sheer amount of gold hanging around their necks. Greatness is measured differently in different sports. So just on the basis of sheer mathematics, this is an overly simplistic way to answer the question – if one even believes the question is worth asking.
But NPR sports commentator Frank DeFord (who usually drives me a bit crazy with his delivery style which seems better suited to reading a ghost story to second graders) hit it right on the head this morning when he pointed out that posing the question of who is the greatest athlete of all time- Michael Phelps, Martina Navratilova, Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan – makes about as much sense as asking who is greater- Shakespeare, Picasso, Twain or Caruso. And he is SO right. How is one to compare something like greatness and excellence across different disciplines? (it’s hard enough to do within a given discipline.) You can’t do it in any sort of meaningful way. . . and yet so many of us seem caught up in fervent and frantic List Making. What in the world is the point of it all? (Just look at the TV schedule and you’ll find all kinds of specials listed with titles like “50 Most Outrageous Moments on TV” or “100 Best Movies of All Time” or “25 Greatest On-Screen Kisses.” Says who? And the better question is Why Bother?)
The “Why” is tough to explain, but my morning show guest today might have an insight. Mary Ellen Geist has written a neat book about quitting her highly successful radio broadcasting job in order to return home and care for her dad, who has Alzheimer’s. One of the things she says in her book is that her mother tries to keep the house completely immaculate, even with all of the pressures of caring for a disabled spouse, and my guest believes that her mom does this because it helps give her a sense of order and control in the face of so much that is beyond her control. And likewise, her dad appreciates doing certain simple household tasks like vacuuming and making the beds (which he does many times over, every single day) because it gives him a sense of doing something and making sense of his life. And Kathy’s mom, when she was rather confused (literally for days) after coming out of one of her last surgeries, would spend so much of the day scribbling furiously into a little spiral notebook – every random bit of information that might be spoken by a nurse or one of us- her way of trying to gain a firm grip on what was going on around her.
I wonder if we as a culture find some sort of similar comfort in constructing all of these Greatest Ever Lists. Maybe it gives us a false sense of being in control of it all. Maybe it makes the universe seem a little less chaotic.
Too bad it makes us look a little bit foolish in the process. As if we needed any help with that.
pictured: Michael Phelps with one of his gold medals. And by the way, i am a huge fan of MP and mean no disrespect to him or his accomplishments by any of the above comments. He is amazing – he achieved a staggering accomplishment in the last Olympics and this one – and was a perfect gentleman and sportsman as he did it. No one deserves that Wheaties box cover more than he does.