Yesterday was Carthage’s commencement,  and even after all these years on the faculty I am still struck by the curious combination of emotions that are part of this day.  The graduates and their families are mostly excited, with a bit of sadness and anxiety perhaps peeking in around the edges.  The faculty shares that excitement, of course, but our sadness (or at least my sadness) is much more than peripheral.  In many cases we are saying goodbye to some of our favorite students and can hope but by no means be certain that the bond we have forged with them will continue in any meaningful way.   There’s also the anxiousness we sometimes feel which verges on the parental in wondering is these graduates will find happiness and fulfillment in a world that they might find to be a bewildering and inhospitable place,  especially compared to the life they have known at Carthage.   And that doesn’t begin to touch on the sense of regret which we might feel at having not pushed a given student hard enough or done all we could on their behalf.  Is there any wonder that there are mixed emotions behind the typical professor’s smile on commencement day?

For me,  the moment where my smile was most strained was actually after the commencement exercises were over, when I searched that enormous crowd for my three voice students who had just graduated:  Andrew Lenox,  Kenton Rauerdinck, and Matt Weiskotten.   I also looked for a former voice student,  Brett Harmeling, who had also graduated.   I looked in vain.   I can’t quite put my finger on it but there was something strangely right in that fruitless search,  as though it were a metaphor for how we try to shape such events to our own scripts, our own desires- but they are bigger than we are and ultimately beyond our perfect control.   And sometimes in such moments, all we can do is stop in our tracks-  give thanks-  and remember that God goes with those we care about.

pictured above:  one tiny slice of the commencement day throng.   By the way,  some of the day’s highlights included. . .

. . .the Carthage Choir’s triumphant performance of “O Clap Your Hands” by Ralph Vaughan Williams. . .

. . . my colleague and friend Charlotte Chell receiving Carthage’s prestigious Flame Award,. . .

. . . the moving and also light-hearted baccalaureate sermon given by a professor from Philadelphia Seminary (his name has just flown out of my head) . . .

. . .  colleague Jane Livingston frantically fixing my academic hood (which I had on backwards)  just as the processional was beginning. . .

. . . the singing of “O Day full of Grace” – one of the most magnificent of all hymns – to conclude baccalaureate . .